Dear Friend..

Alright, well the day has been its normal hectic self. Musical practice ran extra late but went smoothly for the most part. We had a half day at school today so I took full advantage. Bambi and I went to lunch then the park. He went through the whole musical with me. He really is a great boyfriend. We walked back to school then said our farewells. He usually waits for me after practice but he's going to a concert today. In his absence, Leo and I were able to talk a bit.
Now let me explain Leo. After Leo broke up with his long term girlfriend in the summer of 2012, he was depressed and sad. He needed a friend. So I kinda stepped up to the plate to help him. I talked him through moments of depression and misery. In helping him, it seemed I had made him fall in love with me. There was a flirty attitude between he and I. However, I had always said that I was taken, and I refused to cheat. He understood. Or so I thought. A few months ago back in February, he left a bouqet of flowers in my locker after a performance I had done in a play. Bambi saw the flowers and lost his cool. Rage turned to sadness and a mental breakdown soon occured in the school parking lot. I helped him and tried to fix him the best I could. I then went home and messaged Leo on Facebook. I told him he had crossed the line. I threatened him. I wanted him dead. After a few days I cooled off and I forgave him. Why did I forgive him? Who knows? All I know, is that I deeply care for Leo. I can relate to him. He had his heart broken, just as I had mine broken (but that's a story for another time). Bambi told me to choose between him and Leo. I chose him of course. Yet, I couldn't let go of Leo. No matter how hard I tried, I couldn't get him out of my mind. I love him. I care about him. Most people would just choose their boyfriends and ditch the other guy. Well not me. Why? Because I'm me. There's no real explaination. So now Leo and I are forced to talk only on Facebook. We unfriended eachother, but we still send messages. We can have no contact with eachother, but we still find ways to be together. He does tech work for the plays, so he's been staying at the musical practices as of late.
Anyway, back to the story. Since Bambi was gone today, we took advantage. We took the bus together and we talked. We sat close and I was even teaching him how to waltz a bit. We probably look like a couple when we're together. But I know better than to kiss him. I've cheated on every boyfriend previous to Bambi. It has ended badly every time, so I refuse to do it again. You know that saying "once a cheater, always a cheater"? I believe that. But I'm holding myself to my own standard. No kissing or feeling up or dirty talk or anything like that. I'm his friend. He's my friend. No more. He wants to join the army. Of course I'm worried for his saftey. Who wouldn't be? Is it weird that I care so much for him?
Well now it seems I've rambled a lot. I'll try to be more focused next time. But I suppose there is a lot of information that should be known before I break into a story. I'll fill you guys in as we go along. Now I'm on my way home on the second bus. 7:46pm. I guess it's just gonna be a short night and a long day tomorrow. Tomorrow I get to sing my solo song. Whee. Let's see how that goes. Wish me luck.