Back to Me

I feel like I've done so much, but at the same time nothing at all. I try to write more often to keep my mind flowing and clean, but I've been busy. I've been reading a lot of stories and books and poems and sonnets for my English classes. I've been taking (painfully) tedious notes in statistics. I've put more effort than I thought was needed into faking not knowing the language for my German class. I've spent hours upon hours in the library or at home or on the bus reading and studying and writing papers. The good news is that I'm positive 3/4 of my professors like me.
I've been trying to balance out my school life with more social things. I've met friends for lunches/dinners, I've put effort into conversing more with my friends, I've made plans to hang out way more than I normally would. I've gotten great grades so far so I'm trying not to stress myself too much. My back has been killing me the last few days. It's gotten to the point of being so painful that it makes me nauseous. Even right now laying in bed I would rate my pain a 6/10. It's uncomfortable and is getting in the way of my work. I can't sit or stand for long periods to write papers or listen to lectures otherwise I can get into excruciating pain. Chronic pain is a bitch.
Lastly, some stuff has happened in my personal life. Josh's mom got into a crazy accident that totalled her car and sent her to the hospital. It was an interesting day. I've also found myself staying up later than usual. I like to be asleep around 1, but lately I've found myself awake at sometimes almost 3am. I found out my cat needs to take a pill every night, so that's been worrying if we can't get him to take it sometimes. Today I hung out with Gurmeet and his family for a few hours. I learned about Diwali and ate homemade Indian food (and dessert). It was nice just talking and feeling relaxed.
Anyway, I suppose my life could be worse. I've been thinking about the past recently and how much I've grown. I'm not the same person that I was 2yrs ago. Some people just don't seem to understand that. It takes time to accept your life and be happy with who and what you are. I was a very passive person in the beginning of my childhood. I was impressionable and weak and wanted to make everyone else happy. But now I've grown into who I always wanted to be. I'm tough and a little abrasive. I don't have a filter. I don't care what other people think. I'm a straight shooter and don't like fake people, and I have the mouth of a sailor. I've put up extra walls since I was last broken down. It's been a struggle but I've come out stronger over the last couple years. Not everyone has the luck of becoming a better person after tragedy.