Still Here

Hi. I'm still here. So where did I leave off?..oh yes, my boyfriend. My love life has been the biggest cause of strife in my recent life. You see, I have a boyfriend, but there are several guys who are my friend. There's Leo, Mimi, and Jojoe. I've known Leo for a little over a year and he's my age. I helped him through a messy breakup. You'll hear more of him later. Mimi is like a little brother to me. He's a few years younger than I am. He told me that he had fallen in love with me a few months ago, so things with he and I have been a bit weird since then. Jojoe is older than I am. He's about 7yrs older than me. Back about a year ago, he and I used to hook up and have little flings (flings don't mean sex....). Now its a bit complicated. He's always been a bit of a loner, but he's attached to me now. He actually cares about me. I've known him for about 3yrs. He's a good guy, but sometimes he's a bit crazy. We'll go into detail later on these matters, don't worry.
So over the course of my life, I've lost all of my grandparents. My Nana, Mumar, Mufar and Uncle B. Uncle B wasn't really my grandfather. He was my Nana's brother. My actual grandfather died from cancer when my mother was 18, so I never knew him. Uncle B is my inspiration for everything I do. He lived his dream and became a writer and professor. What more could I ask for? I want to be like him someday. I want to look back on my life and not regret anything.
However, at this very moment, I regret a majority of what I have done in high school. I've cheated, stolen, lied, gossiped and said mean things. Everyone does it, I'm sure. Its just that my mind isn't really normal. When I do something wrong, I feel guilty. But not the normal kind of guilt. This guilt builds up inside me until I explode. I like having somewhere to vent and talk. That's kinda what blogs are for...right? I can say my problems and not worry about who will hear them. The daily life I live is hectic and chaotic. I wake up at 6:33am and go to school until 2:30. Then I have musical practice at 2:45 (I'm in a musical, with a kinda lead role). We get dismissed around 6. Then I have a 2hr public bus ride home. I get home to cold dinner and a quiet family. Its around 9 by the time I eat and settle down. Maybe if I'm lucky, I'll watch some TV or go online. Probably not. So then I shower and sleep. Lather, rinse, repeat. Day after day. Then on weekends, I work in a small bagel shop. I make bagels for a living. Great, right? I've been working there about 8months now. I get along with everyone mostly. You'll hear more about work later.
Time is running out. 11:30 already? Damn it. I really need some sleep. Oh, and P.S., the musical I'm in premiers in 9 days from tomorrow. May 9th. I'm sick so my voice isn't the best. Life hates me sometimes.