The last week or so has put my life into perspective. I'm usually the one in my group who listens to your problems and gives advice, and I love it. I love helping my friends and seeing them happy. Leo has been working through some tough shit for a while, but the weight is just too heavy for one person to carry. I remember a point in my own life not too long ago where I felt like everything was pointless. I felt like a waste of space and I was good for nothing. Being a depressed and anxious perfectionist is very difficult. But then my life actually got better. I met new people, reconnected with old friends, and saw that life can be just as sweet as it is sour. A coworker of mine, Gurmeet, has also become a close friend. We spoke on the phone for over 3 1/2 a few days ago. We both cried and laughed and swapped stories from our lives. He came out to me as being gay. It meant the world to me that he trusted me with that. Prior to him telling me, he had never said it out loud before. He told me about his home life, specifically his mother. We just kept talking well into the night. We worked together yesterday and I brought him a little bag of chocolates. I've been making homemade chocolates with fun fillings, so I made him his own special ones. In return, he bought me lunch. We bust each other's balls at work, and bicker like a married couple. But when we actually sit down and talk, it's such a beautiful friendship. With that being said, my I sometimes take my life for granted. I've gone through some tough shit in my life. Shit that I would never wish on anyone. Memories and thoughts still haunt me time to time. But my life in the here and now is sunshine and unicorns compared to Leo and Gurmeet. I've hit a few rough patches recently, but we all do. When I think about how much my life sucks sometimes, I think about how others have it so much worse.
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