A few days ago I attended a going away party for Vince. I'm driving with him to Tennessee next weekend and dropping him off to live there forever. It's going to be a very sad occasion but I'm happy for him. Anyway, I was anxious about the party because I knew I'd only know a handful of people there. I'm very painfully introverted so being social and getting to know people isn't my strong suit. I immediately found Vince as I walked in and he introduced me to a few of his friends. I felt awkward at first because I didn't know any of them, but the more we talked a group the more comfortable I became. There were six of us total by the end of it who were getting along beautifully. I feel like I bonded most with the only other female in the group. She's very much like me in the sense of not being a girly girl, plus she wore a fanny pack which was awesome. I personally own a few myself and think they need to come back into style. Anyway, I ended up staying two hours later than I intended because I didn't want to leave. I was having fun getting to know all of them and talking about various interests. The guys and I talked a bit about video games and the other girl and I bonded over music and other general interests. I was the only one not really drinking since I had to drive home, but Vince's brother had taken the initiative of setting up one of the spare bedrooms for me in case I wanted to drink and crash there. His brother and sister-in-law are very sweet people and I felt honored that they went out of their way to make sure I had a place to stay in case I wanted to drink with everyone. I eventually had to leave because I had plans with Seth the next morning and wanted to get some sleep beforehand so I wasn't completely exhausted. Saying goodbyes was difficult because I truly did like his friends and want to hang out with them more. Vince gave me his blessing to hang out with them after he leaves because he could tell how well we were all getting along. Apparently they told him after I left how much they loved me and how sweet and fun I was. It sounds like we're all getting together again on Friday to help Vince do some last minute packing as well as just hang out for a bit before he leaves. I feel like it'll be an emotional goodbye since they've all known each other for years, and Tennessee isn't exactly close enough to take a quick trip to every once in a while to visit. I won't be saying my final goodbye until Sunday when he drops me at the airport to come home, but I already told him to be ready for some tears. I like to put up a certain front, but in reality I'm a massive cry baby. I know it's going to be emotional because he and I have gotten so close over the last year and a half since we met. It'll be sad losing a friend, but it'll give me an excuse to travel a little and see him down south every once in a while. We normally chat on Discord almost daily and I know that won't change, but it's just knowing that he isn't physically here that'll make me sad. However, this is the start of a new (and better) chapter in his life, so ultimately I am very happy for him.
Anyway, yesterday Seth and I went to the beach. It was his birthday last week and I told him we'd go out over the weekend to do something together to celebrate. He decided on the beach. I never took him for a beach kind of person, but I was very enthusiastic about going. I grew up only a block from the beach, so my entire childhood revolved around it. We'd go on night walks along the sand and sit in the lifeguard chairs to look at the stars and listen to the waves. During the day we'd play in the water and watch as the sandpipers ran to and fro with the waves on the shoreline. There was a park not too far from my house that was on the beach. I'd go on the swings and run around and play with my favorite neon green RC car, all as the smell of the ocean and sound of the waves served as the backdrop. While driving to the beach with Seth I mentioned how I was surprised he wanted to go to the beach. He looked at me and said he chose the beach because he knew I'd love it. It made me a little emotional to hear that, but I didn't show it. It was overall a very enjoyable day together. We swam together in the water, which really just meant I latched onto him like a koala bear as we drifted with the waves. We talked and laughed and enjoyed the time we had. At times there was no conversation, only bobbing together in the ocean. We decided to lay out in the sun for a bit and continued our banter and usual conversation. During the trip Seth would softly say how much he loved and adored me. Our entire relationship is difficult to explain since we truly do love and trust each other, yet aren't formally dating. We both agree we'd make a great couple, but it wouldn't last. We have a few key features that don't align, so we know it wouldn't be a seriously long-term relationship. That doesn't stop us from being affectionate, though. With a vast majority of people Seth can be off-putting and harsh at times, but I get to see his soft side. Laying together on the beach was one of those times where both of our guards were completely down. We laid on our stomaches and dug for cool rocks and shells (which was successful) and shared fond memories from our pasts. We both decided that we want to visit the beach again in the next couple weeks to spend more quality time together before I start up with work and school.Fun Fact of the Day - I have a stuffed animal named Salvatore that I sleep with every night. Not sure if you guys will remember Bambi, but back when we were still dating in high school he gave me a giraffe pillow pet. I named him Salvatore after Bambi's middle name. Even after we broke up I couldn't get myself to get rid of him. Salvatore has come on many trips with me and even on a few airplane rides to serve as a pillow on long flights. I doesn't feel right when I sleep without him. I tuck him into my arm every night and snuggle in for bed. I'm sure it sounds ridiculous for a 25 year old to sleep with a stuffed animal every night, but he's one of the things in my life that's remained constant. There's some deep psychology in that, but that's for another time.
Music drop time yet again. I hope you guys aren't getting tired of this section or think it's silly. I put a lot of work into keeping the music list organized and making sure I don't post duplicate songs. I have a whole folder in my phone with every single song I've posted on here along with ones I want to post. There are hundreds of songs, but hopefully someone out there likes at least a few.
What’s up Kate? I liked this playlist the best
ReplyDeleteGlad you’re doing so well 👋
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