Return

I've been gone for a little bit. Sometimes breaks are necessary. My life is always crazy, but after my last post, life got a little too crazy. So many things have happened since I lasted posted.
After my last update, my pledge sister Jen dropped out. I was alone during the last half of my pledging. It was hell, but I made it. I became a sister and am the only member of the Spring '14 Kappa Class. I'm proud of my title as the one and only Kappa, but also depressed that Jen didn't finish with me. After cross (the ceremony of becoming a sister), everyone congratulated me. I'm the first one in the sorority's history to cross as a single sister. Since I crossed, they've been the best pseudo-family I could ever ask for.
Then, I met someone. I'm a part of a couple online groups and communities, as well as like a bunch of entertainment pages run by the same group of guys. Within those groups and pages, those guys are like celebrities. One of them told me to message him. Let's call him Jeff. I thought he was kidding, but he wasn't. He sent me a message and that's where it all started. He asked for my number, and we began speaking all day every day. I began to see him more as a friend than as a leader of the communities. We eventually Skyped and loved it. We were flirting like crazy and I may have flashed him my breasts a couple of times over Skype. We're so open with each other, and I love it. However, he lives in Mississippi, and I live in New York. He's also 10yrs my senior. It's strange, but we like it. In past couple weeks, we haven't spoken as often. He has a few big projects coming up, so I know he's been busy with those.
The next thing is Kevin. Kevin and I have been getting closer and more like friends. Last week we hung out outside of work. He picked me up and we went to a tattoo shop. He wants to touch up his tattoo, and then get a couple new ones. We spent most of the time in traffic, so we spent a lot of time talking. We opened up to each other about exs, family troubles, and problems at work. It was a change of pace to get to know him outside of work. He texted me afterwards and said he had fun hanging out with me and that we should do it again. We're planning on spending all day together tomorrow to get his tattoo(s). I think Kevin is attractive, but I would never make a move on him. I know he isn't interested, and I'm already in a relationship. I see him more as a cool friend than a coworker now.
I've also had some contact with Leo since my last update. There was a musical at my high school and a lot of my friends were in it. I went to see it, and I sort of expected Leo to be there on account of running lights and sound. I was right, he was there. Since Bambi wasn't there, I was able to talk to him a bit and interact. I was worried that there were maybe some hard feelings, and things may be awkward. They weren't. We had a few short exchanges and were in the same circle of conversation among our friends. During intermission, he gave me a free Snickers bar from the concession stand (which he was helping to run). It was a nice gesture. We spoke a little bit after as well, and I saw him with his new girlfriend. She's the daughter of a pastor, and has a twin sister. I personally have trouble telling them apart, but I'm sure he can. Leo looked so happy with his girlfriend. I'm happy for him. I really do want him to succeed in a relationship. I decided to email him that night. I just told him I was proud of him for going into the military and deciding for sure what he was doing. I also wished him luck with his relationship. He emailed me back giving me the best of wishes and saying he hopes to talk to me sometime again. I saw him once more at the high school's music concert. Bambi was with me, so Leo and I only made some eye contact and smiled a few times. It was small, but nice. The next event was supposed to be his graduation. I was going to attend to see them finally cross the stage and open a new chapter in their lives. Since my manager is a dick, he changed my schedule and made it impossible for me to go. I spent the day pissed off and annoyed at him. Kyle sent me pics of he and a couple friends who graduated. I felt bad that I didn't make it to graduation, both for my friends and for Leo. I'm thinking about emailing him again just to tell him I'm proud of him, but I don't want to seem needy or something. I kind of do want to start talking to him again, but I know it wouldn't end well for anyone. I'm still debating an email.
The final and most important thing to happen was with my father. He had a stroke a few days before Easter and ended up in the hospital. We spent Easter in the hospital, but he was released a couple of days after. It was scary seeing him in the hospital. He lost about 5hrs of his memory and doesn't know what happened between him leaving work and him coming home. My mom and I just thought he was late, but he came home disoriented and didn't know basic information. He didn't know my mom's name, the President of the U.S., my and my brother's middle names, or his own birthday. My mom rushed him to the ER and stayed there with him until he was assigned a room and admitted around 1am. Needless to say, the experience was eye-opening. It could have been a lot worse if we didn't catch it early like we did. He only still has some (worsened) memory problems, very mild speech confusion (switching up words like pancakes and cupcakes), and pronunciation issues (saying John like Joan). He's still seeing neurologists about it, and taking new medication to prevent it from happening again. He's also lost some weight since this happened. He's dropped around 40lbs so far. My dad is obese, so it's going to take a little more poundage to bring him to a healthy weight.
Anyway, that's my life so far. It's complicated as always, and I'm trying to just survive. I'm taking it one day at a time, and getting through it. I'll keep on top of posting, I promise. I'm actually supposed to be meeting Andrea at the mall in an hour and I'm not even dressed. I'll always be a hot mess.