(Un)Inhabitable Zone

I never would have thought that I would leave my visit with Leo in worse condition than when I went in. I had been anxious and nervous all morning looking forward to seeing Leo at the hospital. I couldn't even enjoy my yoga class because I kept thinking about how to get there and what to say and where to go and the rules I had to follow. I got to the campus about 45mins early and was told I couldn't enter. I loitered at a local Dunkin Donuts until the appropriate time. I got my visitor wrist band and walked to the building. It was nice on the outside (and the inside too). I figured out where to go and saw Leo sitting at a table by a window playing with some pin-up girl playing cards. I didn't want to seem too excited to hug him, but it felt so good to feel him again. To know he was ok. We talked about a lot of things, including astronomy and astrophysics. I was only supposed to stay for 20mins because I had a class to get to, but I skipped because I just couldn't leave him. I brought food and we ate and drank tea and talked. Leo eventually told me that he had spoken to someone about our relationship. They thought the relationship was unhealthy because Leo has feelings for me beyond friendship. I had known this already, but didn't think it was getting in the way to the magnitude he explained it to me. He compared me to a cigarette. Saying I was bad for him, but he just can't seem to walk away on his own. That me being in his life made it more difficult. It was like he had dropped a bomb on my head. I tried to lighten the mood a little and play it off and tell him that was stupid. But he got very serious and told me I was being manipulative trying to convince him not to listen to the guy who told him this. The hour visit was up way too soon. I told him that if he didn't want to ever see me or speak to me again, I wasn't his mother. I can't force him to do anything. But I made sure to make it clear that he won't be the only one affected if he decides to just cut me out "like breast cancer". He walked me to the exit and I turned around to say goodbye and he was already walking back, too far to yell for him. I left with the group of visitors and told myself to hold it together until I got outside. I took a deep breath of fresh air and put my headphones in. As I walked away, I looked back at the window where Leo was sitting during our visit and it was empty. Empty chairs at an empty table. I turned my music up and didn't look back again.