The Final Final

I took my final exam today. Pre Calc. I didn't even try. Math isn't my strong subject by any means. I got to school around 7:30am but the test didn't begin till 10:15. People from my class just sat around and talked and semi-studied. It was fun. Bambi was there. We were in the cafeteria. Bambi and I were happier than we were yesterday. I was smiling and he was laughing. We were okay again. I only saw Leo maybe twice today. I'm seeing him less and less due to my lack of actual classes. He was so sad and upset and boderline angry today on fb. He feels like an outcast and that no one loves him. I love him. But I can't show it. This constant push and pull struggle is horrible to live with. Leo and Bambi are never both happy. At least one of them is usually sad or depressed. It's like maintaining 2 boyfriends at once. I'm such a whore. I want to help Leo, not entice him. Then I try to draw boundaries and he feels lonely and seperated. It's a bad feeling having to constantly keep up with two guys and not being able to tell them how much their burdons weigh me down. I can't really do much. My hands are tied.
I came home and made a bagel. Again. But this time I put strawberry tofu cream cheese on it. Sounds gross, tastes great. After my bagel, my mom and I went out. We went to The Mary Louis Academy. It's an all girl elite Catholic high school referred to as Snob Hill. All the girls are smart and usually come from money or high name families. My mother went there and graduated. Most girls who enter don't graduate; they transfer out because it's such a harsh school. Nuns and physical punishment. High standards and excellence. I applied there for high school and got in. Special me. I declined. I'm not into the structured environment. I needed to be free a bit, not kept under lock and key. Anyway, so my mom and I went there today to look at a summer camp they were hosting. My mom wants to send my brother there. We took a tour and reviewed the activities. My mom liked it and she paid for 6 weeks of camp for him. 6 weeks in day camp, 6 weeks of him out of my hair. After we finished with the open house, we drove around the neighborhood and talked about the houses and how nice they are. We agreed that we were both hungery so we went out to a diner for dinner. We both ordered omlettes and toast. We talked and laughed and had fun. My mom and I haven't had bonding time like that in a while. It was nice. We fight like cats and dogs sometimes, but other times she's like my sister/best friend. I hate to admit it, but I love my mother.
Now, I'm exhausted. After Leo's meltdown on fb, I took a shower and layed in bed. I'm still in bed 2hrs later. I can sleep in a bit tomorrow. No classes till 1. I'm going to take full advantage of my late class. SLEEP.